劳伦斯奔驰诗苑|伊恩·格雷格森《少校劳伦斯》

Major Lawrence 少校劳伦斯 —for Steve Ormrod ——致史蒂夫·奥莫罗德 By Ian Gregson 译/许景城 I wipe the film from my gasmask’s lenses,
原标题:诗苑|伊恩·格雷格森《少校劳伦斯》MajorLawrence少校劳伦斯—forSteveOrmrod——致史蒂夫·奥莫罗德ByIanGregson译/许景城Iwipethefilmfrommygasmask’slenses,peeringtowardstheflaringhorizonwhereaScud’sslippedthroughourPatriotdefences,butthefireworksfuzzinthelenses’scratches.LawrencewithhisArabdisguiseonIswithmeoften,andhowLeanlingersondesertstretcheslikeaflaringpainexpandedofthesafetymatchessnuffedoutbyO’Tooleonhisfingers,asthoughwhatdrovethatArabcampaignwasLawrence’sepicsicknessandneed,dividedastheloudspeakersonpolesaroundusbroadcastingScudalarmsbutalsocallstoprayer.Contrastingroles–ascholarinflictingguerrillaharms,determinedthattheArabsbefreed,butservingfirsttheBritishempire.HowIhatethehotpissyaurahehatedofsquaddiesenmasse–amajorfeelingminor,Idisappear,I’mghostlyandanonymousinsidetheranksofscientifickillersandtheshimmeringskyandsandoftheGulf,thinkingofLawrencenamingfloraandrocks,inhabitinghisSevenPillars,drawingonwartoexpresshimselfandloominglikeDavidLeanasdirectorofhimself,solargeinthebiggerpicture.Ishrinkinsidemycharcoal-linedjacket.I’mcontainedbetweenmyhelmetandrubberbootsbumpingalongoneoftherouteswe’vebulldozedoutofthedesert,sickofairbornepoisonsandtheracket,bothsidesvyingforspoils–andpineforadishdasha,andrafiqtoleadmetoaruineddesertpalacewhoseclaywaskneadedwithessentialoilssoIcouldunderstand,inArabic,eachroomwithitsownscentofjessamine,ofvioletorofrose.TheSevenPillarsglowingatsunsetatsandstoneWadiRumechoedtohimlikeahighmuezzin.LeanhasLawrencesaythedesert’sclean,that’swhyhelovesit.Nowthesandsswarmwithlitteredbunkers,canvaswithmildew,redolenceofpissandfeetandVietnam,theTVcrewscomposingascene.HowmanytimesI’vewilledyou,LawrenceofArabia,todefythenormOfclassandempire.Ihavebeenyou,seizingAqaba,whereyoudiminishandhateyourselfforbeingcruel,rejectinghonoursandspoils,andpushbeyondthelossofselfinaction–eatinggreendatesandcamelsinew,lovingthedesertlikeaholyfool,rejectingevenroomsscentedwithessentialoilsinfavourofthatpurebreathofthescentlessdesertwind,topunishyourselfwithrarefaction,andpushbeyondtotastethatabsenceofscentinanairthrobbingoutofendlessmilesofscorchedwaste.我擦了擦防毒面罩的镜头薄膜,朝着发亮的水平线凝视,那儿飞毛腿导弹,穿透我们爱国者导弹的重重防线,但是,烟火在镜头的擦痕中,变得模糊。劳伦斯伪装成阿拉伯人,经常和我在一起,利恩如何在沙漠徘徊的场景,蔓延得像一阵灼烧疼痛;安全火柴不断地膨胀被奥图尔的手指掐灭,好像触发阿拉伯运动的动因是劳伦斯的久疾与贪婪,被分割,如电杆上的喇叭扩音器围绕着我们,播放飞毛腿导弹的警报却也呼吁祷告。对比不同的角色——一位学者施以游击队似的伤害,坚信阿拉伯人应被释放,但优先服务于大英帝国。我是多么厌恶又热又臭的气味就像他讨厌全体新兵的那种气味——一位少校感觉渺小,像幽灵一样,无名无姓,我消失在科学杀手的各种头衔中,闪烁的天空和海湾的沙滩,想起劳伦斯给植物、岩石命名,住着他的‘七柱’寓所,利用战争,来炫耀自我,像大卫·利恩一样,若隐若现,成为自己的领帅,在更大的格局中如此高大。我蜷缩在一件碳黑线条的茄克衫里,包裹在头盔与雨靴之间,顺着其中一个路线,顛簸而行,走我们从沙漠中已推平出来的路线,厌恶空传的毒气和喧闹,双方在争夺战利品——想要一套阿拉伯长衫,希望伙伴带领我到一座废墟的沙漠宫殿,那里黏土掺揉着各种精油,这样,我便会知道,在阿拉伯文化中,每个房间,有它自己的味道,茉莉香、紫罗兰香或玫瑰香。‘七柱’在瓦地伦砂岩的夕阳中,发亮,像一位高大的穆安津,与他交辉相映。利恩希望劳伦斯说,这沙漠是洁净的,那是他喜欢它的原因。如今,沙地聚集各种杂乱的燃料库、发霉的帆布,充满小便、脚和越南的气味,以及取景的电台人员。我曾多次命令你,阿拉伯的劳伦斯,去挑衅帝国和社会等级的规范。我已像你一样,攻下亚喀巴,在那里你变小并厌恶自己的残酷不仁,拒绝荣耀和战利品,不顾行动中的自我迷失,而继续推进——吃着青枣和骆驼的肌腱,像大傻瓜一样,爱着这片沙漠,甚至拒绝带着精油气味的房间,而去喜欢那纯净的、无味的沙漠风息,用稀薄化的方式惩罚自己,并义无反顾地去品尝空气中所缺少的气味,从漫无边际的、烧焦的垃圾堆中,悸动而出。(选自《英语世界》2018年第8期)【相关解析见今日第一篇推文】责任编辑:

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